President Obama, 7/13/2012: “There are a lot of wealthy, successful Americans who agree with me — because they want to give something back. They know they didn’t — look, if you’ve been successful, you didn’t get there on your own. You didn’t get there on your own. I’m always struck by people who think, well, it must be because I was just so smart. There are a lot of smart people out there. It must be because I worked harder than everybody else. Let me tell you something — there are a whole bunch of hardworking people out there. (Applause.)
If you were successful, somebody along the line gave you some help. There was a great teacher somewhere in your life. Somebody helped to create this unbelievable American system that we have that allowed you to thrive. Somebody invested in roads and bridges. If you’ve got a business — you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen. “
I heard about this speech last week while I was in Germany and although I was shocked that he would express his honest feelings about American businessmen in an election year, I thought, “good for him – at least he’s willing to be honest and true to his principles and put his true feelings out there to let the voters decide now”. Let me be clear – these sentences in his speech were no accident. This is truly how this man feels – this is his truth. This speech was written for him and he most assuredly reviewed it, rewrote it and practiced it several times. He KNEW what was in the text of the speech. President’s have speech writers that are very careful to ensure that the sentences are clear, cannot be misunderstood or misconstrued in any way. He did not go off script – he truly spoke from his heart and was throwing fresh meat to his partisan crowd. Listen to the live version of his speech on YouTube to hear the cheers, jeers and the increasing, pulsating, collective heartbeat of the crowd as the raw meat was thrown to them. They eagerly devoured it and impatiently waited for the next morsel to be thrown their way and Mr. Obama obliged, feeding on the energy of his adoring fans.
What Mr. Obama fails to explain: Since we all use the same infrastructure, but some are more successful than others, what is the difference? Why does one succeed and one not succeed? Might good ideas and hard work have something to do with that? Barack Obama suggested that no, hard work and smarts have little or nothing to do with that. “There are a lot of smart people out there! There are a whole bunch of hard working people out there!”, Obama said with a sneer.
But, if the difference between success and failure is government-provided services such as education, roads, bridges and firefighters, and NOT talent or hard work, then HOW does one explain the existence of BOTH successful and unsuccessful people in a country REQUIRED BY LAW to provide these services to ALL equally?
So now, the polls are telling him that his words were offensive to the real Americans that have not only worked hard, but sacrificed blood, sweat and tears to make their businesses what they are today. The cat is now out of the bag – Mr. Obama has told us what he really thinks of Americans and their aspirations. He is backpedaling and telling everyone that those words are not what he meant to say. But one look at his face during his speech reveals that he meant it. It is an affront to all clear-thinking Americans with a brain to listen to this man try to tell us that he didn’t say what he said. All anyone needs to do is open up YouTube or go to his own website and read his words. Really – how stupid does he think we are??
At a time when we are hearing of real, heroic men in Aurora, CO who threw themselves in front of their true loves to protect them from the bullets of a mad man, we are now hearing a pathetic, man-child president – the most powerful man in the world – lie his pants off to try to regain a few points in the polls because he’s too cowardly to stand by his words. Even worse, he is afraid to stand by his true principles. I would have more respect for him if he had been willing to stand by his own words. This president’s past statements reveal the true nature of this man and what he thinks about Americans (never mind that he sat in the pews listening to Reverend Wright for over 20+ years and now disavows that fact – but that’s another story).
This is what I truly find most disgusting and pathetic about this president. His inability to act like a principled man. I was raised with REAL men who told the truth, no matter the consequences. Real men who were up in the morning before the sun rose and were plowing the fields or preparing to open their store for the day. Real men who worked hard to support their families, ensured their children were respectful to their parents and elders and were willing to help their neighbors at a moment’s notice – without any support from the government. Sure there were liars, but they were quickly ostracized and only the truth tellers earned the respect of their peers. At a time when this country needs strong, principled leaders to lead us, we have nothing but cowardly panderers, who are willing to say and do whatever it takes to maintain control, power and money, no matter the cost to this nation – all under the guise of wanting “to help the people”.
This president has been the worst president ever for protecting our civil rights http://www.npr.org/2011/10/10/141213273/op-ed-obama-devastating-for-civil-liberties – and in fact, has been actively taking them away as his partisan supporters stand by and spew their drivel and every possible justification they can think of. Yet they know in their hearts that had a president on the opposite side of the aisle tried the same crap they would have been up in arms. His actions have been devastating to our economy, our small businesses and even worse, to my wallet. As a middle-class American, I can’t believe that his poll numbers are even as high as they are right now. Where are the principled democrats? Principled democrats would be listening to that voice in the back of their head that is telling them that this president is dangerous to this country, not only in terms of our freedom, but also to our future economic success. His disdain for those citizens who are productive has been made very obvious.
What has become even more horrifying is listening to the people who believe him. The people who will nod approvingly at his every word and believe his blatant deceit only because he belongs to *their* party. They will vote for him no matter what he says, because he’s a democrat. I guess that’s where he gets the idea that ALL Americans are stupid, when he looks out on the crowd and they are looking at him with adoring eyes and he thinks, “you’re all suckers”. He is the most arrogant, narcissistic, petulant, vindictive, thin-skinned president I have ever seen in my life. We need a MAN – a real man – to lead us away from the abyss. Vote for Ron Paul!
For centuries luscious fragrances have been created using flowers, leaves, spices, woods, fruits and leaves. There are many types of plants that do not secrete the oils to use in perfumes. Perfume designers will than resort to using synthetic chemicals to mirror the natural fragrances.
Many top perfume designers are careful when creating their fragrances and avoid testing on animals. There are certain perfumes that are created using musk’s from the fatty substances of the male deer. But do to Peta (People for the ethical treatment of animals) many use synthetic ‘musk’ to avoid any issues regarding the unethical treatment of animals.
Creating the Ingredients
With top perfume companies that create designer perfumes the ingredients are chosen and brought to a manufacturing center for processing. Chemists carefully blend the ingredients, extracting oils from plants and creating synthetic fragrances. The next step is to use solvent extraction, steam distillation or expression which is one of the easiest forms of oil extraction.
It is common to create over a hundred uniquely different scents in order to create one fragrance. Once the perfume is created alcohol is added to the mixture in order to create a distinct scent. Many of the top perfumes are stored and aged to create a stronger fragrance. Once the exact scent is reached the perfume is than packaged and shipped to its destinations.
Creating a designer perfume does not happen overnight. It takes months of chemistry and planning to create the exact desired scent for perfume, you can distinctively tell the difference between a fragrance that has gone through a rigorous process and scents that have not. The better quality perfumes last longer and have a high-quality fragrance. Designers are prideful when it comes to their blends and placing their name on the labels.
Companies such as Hugo Boss, Burberry, Chanel and many others will not allow a bad batch of perfume to be shipped to their stores or distributors. No wonder people enjoy paying a little more for a designer perfume.
Burberry is a world renowned luxury designer house that was established in 1856 by Thomas Burberry. With over 473 locations and based in London, Burberry distributes fashion accessories, clothing and an exclusive line of perfumes and fragrances.
One of the most widely used trademarks is their recognizable tartan pattern. Anyone who has owned a trench coat or has seen others wearing the non- iconic piece was invented by none other than Thomas Burberry himself. The company has multiple individual stores and franchises that sell their products. Listed on the London Stock Exchange, the company carries some of the most popular and aromatic fragrances that is sold today.
Summer breezes, romantic nights Burberry’s ‘Summer‘ is one of the most beautiful fragrances on the market and has been sold out in many department stores. Notes of translucent water lily, rose, freesia, apple and with hints of musk and vanilla, Burberry summer is a best seller.
Are you looking to purchase a tantalizing fragrance for your mate?
Burberry Summer 2010 is an aromatic fragrance that will tickle your nose buds. Tested on thousands of men both domestically and internationally, it will take your senses to a completely different level.
Love floral fragrances and limited edition perfumes?
With the fragrance of English roses, lily of the valley, cyclamen and a hint of musk, Burberry London edition special perfume is a must add to your collection. Delicately scented, light, soft and romantic this is perfume is meant to capture the attention of the opposite sex.
When Burberry body perfume for women presented itself to the world, it was a bestseller! Designed and tested by women, the perfume has notes of absinthe, freesia and peach. Subtle, soft, refreshing! It’s one of the only designer perfumes that will last a long time. Dab on the wrists, tap behind the ear, a little goes a long way with Burberry body perfume for women.
Burberry has so many fragrances it can be hard to make a choice. Buying Burberry perfume online has never been easier, if you can’t decide simply pick a couple to add to your collection. With Burberry you can travel to London without leaving home.
So many people are looking to take advantage of running a home business and make money through the internet, although not everyone is passionate about web designing and the official Google Webmaster Guidelines. There are some people who want to skip the hard work that is involved in providing useful content to users and simply try to manipulate Google’s algorithms by using automated software to build backlinks.
The key factors to remember when you are building a merchant website and want to be successful in gaining large amounts of traffic is to ensure the navigation on your site is clear and that the information is easy recognizable so that users get what they came for and don’t end up leaving out of frustration. If you site works well and gives people satisfaction after they have visited, they are more likely to recommend or remember it for future reference, this way you will receive viral traffic.
The next key step is to ensure that your SEO campaign includes quality on page layout, this means you should be sparing with the keywords and make useful resources for your visitors, this way you create the ideal balance of indicators for search engines without over optimizing. You should also have quality sites linking in to your sites pages, Google will see these backlinks and assume your site is also worth ranking highly. One way to check a potential backlinking resource is to use Majestic SEO’s AC Rank tool, this will tell you how much a particular website is cited across the web and if its external links are trustworthy.
Now that you have prepared your site for search engine spiders, you can proceed to set up your online shopping cart where customers can easily, securely and quickly purchase goods from you using a credit card and then receive a receipt to their email address.
If you require an internet merchant account to process thousands of transactions daily, you should search for merchant services providers on Google, these third parties can offer lower rates on the percentage of each sale you make that goes to the acquiring bank. These payment processing companies have been in the industry for many years and therefore they have set up lots of accounts in bulk and increased their trust rating with banks. Depending on how valuable your products are the merchant solutions provider will be able to pass savings on to you, they also know all of the latest software for secure checkout systems.
Excitement builds after the proposal; you are now planning for your wedding and the last thing you need is to be wearing mix- matched lingerie. Only your soon-to-be husband will know what is underneath, so choosing wedding lingerie is important. Here are a few simple steps that will help you choose the right lingerie for your wedding day.
Be aware that temptation will strike during preparation of the wedding; make sure you choose the gown first and the lingerie last. The style of your dress will determine the type of lingerie you will purchase.
Purchasing a strapless corset or a long line bra that fastens at the small of your back would be the right lingerie to buy. These two pieces can be worn under an array of styles and will show off your best assets.
A majority of brides choose to wear hosiery. If you are wearing sandals choose to opt for toe-less pantyhose. Wearing a closed to shoe? If your wedding gown is white, choose white pantyhose. The garter can be based on the color scheme of your wedding colors.
Silk, satin, lace, a beautiful nightie or teddy should be chosen for the wedding night. Once the party is over romance sets in and sets the mood for the entire honeymoon. Choose romantic colors such as red, black, white, deep purple or any other type of color that will make you feel sensual on your honeymoon. Some brides opt to choose their new husband’s favorite color. When choosing your wedding lingerie take your time and decide what looks best on you.
Always purchase the lingerie that you feel comfortable with. Bootie shorts, thong, string whatever makes you feel sensual is what you buy. Throw hints to your husband-to-be, asking him what he would like to see you wearing before and after your wedding. Wedding lingerie will not only be purchased for your special day; but will be treasured for a lifetime.
Zoë Leavenworth was a nineteen year old freshman and was driving back home to Devils Base, Alabama. The town was small and the name was creepy itself but it was a nice town to live in. She got a scholarship to Troy University. Although it was two hours away she was fine with that. It was away from home but still close enough that she could go home on a visit. She missed her family, friends, and boyfriend back home and was glad to be returning home for the two weeks. Even though the town sounded creepy it still was a festive one too during the holiday season. She had the radio on and heard the weather forecast saying that they were supposed to get some snow and ice sometime after midnight tonight. The radio station started playing music again when the song was interrupted by a news story. “I have just gotten word that convicted murder Victor Gomez just escaped from the state penitentiary and is armed with a homemade sword of some sort. He is very dangerous so please do not approach him but call 911 instead.” the person said. She started shaking because she had to stop soon for gas and hurry and get home. Not only because of the storm but she was now afraid of being out there by herself with an escaped murder somewhere out there. She reached a gas station and pulled in. She just wanted to pay for her gas, fill up, and then leave. She needed something to drink but she would survive without it.
She grabbed her keys, wallet, and cellphone and got out. She started walking to the store and could hear the gravel crunching under her feet. She approached the windows and peered in to see if it was opened. When she did however she saw a gruesome scene. She screamed and ran back to her car and locked all the doors and windows. She had no idea what happened there but something did and she was not going to stay and see. She stuck the key in and tried to start it but nothing. “No.” she screamed and with shaky hands she tried again. She wanted to get out of there before something happened to her but her car wouldn’t start. She picked up her cell phone to try and text someone but her phone was dead. “Strange I charged it before I left and I haven’t used it so why would it be dead?’ she asked herself. She threw the phone in her purse along with her wallet and keys. She would hitch hike if she had to just to get out.
She had just threw her keys, phone, and wallet in her purse and was about to get out when a mangled and bloodied man came out of the convenience store. She saw that he was approaching her and she quickly got out and started running. She didn’t know where she was running too but she knew she had to get out. Something happened inside that store and whatever it was it looked bad. However she was not going to stick around and wait because she was afraid that whatever was going on something would happen to her. She ran the two miles down to the highway and was tired but knew she couldn’t stop no matter what.
Three hours earlier:
Michael McMullen was behind the counter of the convenience store and stocking up the cigarettes and things. He had the radio to listen to the weather report and heard the news of the escaped murderer. He wasn’t afraid though since the store was located along the highway in the middle of nowhere. He continued working and only turned around when the bell above the door chimed to let him know a customer was coming in. “May I help you?” he asked the guy on the other side. The guy looked kind of rough and not familiar too him but he didn’t think anything about it. “Give me all your money” he said to him as he pulled out the homemade sword and stuck it to his stomach. So with shaky hands Michael then opened the drawer and gave him the cash that was in there. “Give me the keys to your car.” he said to him. Michael than took out his keys and handed it to him. “Please don’t hurt me. I have a wife and a new baby at home.” he told him but it was too late the guy had stuck the sword into his chest.
As soon as Michael was down he was beaten with the handle of a hammer and brain matter splattered all over the wall along with the blood. Victor thought about dragging the body to the freezer but instead he just left the man lying there on the floor bleeding and fighting for his life. Victor than went behind the counter and found the gun that was kept there. He then shot the man one time for good measure and pocketed the weapons. He then got in the stolen car and left. Michael waited till he knew that the man was gone and called 911 and somehow he made it out of the store. There was a woman outside that he tried to approach but she screamed and took off. Michael than collapsed to the ground and died.
When she reached the highway she wasn’t sure which way she should go. She turned left when she turned in so she turned right to go down the route she had already gone. She was wondering why the convenience store was located in that spot but didn’t have time to figure it out because she was running for her life and trying to run from a murderer.
Sometimes we don’t realize who our favorite authors really are. For years, when people asked me to list mine, the list included Ayn Rand, Emily Bronte, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Robert Heinlein, Adam Corby, J.D. Salinger, Muriel Spark, Betty Smith and a few others who changed from time to time. Mary Dolan did not figure in that list. Why? Because I couldn’t even remember her name. But this did not mean that she had not left a lasting impression on me. It was just that I took her for granted. I believed, foolishly, that she would always be there for me, her book waiting to be re-read, available at a moment’s notice in the local library.
I could no more think to name her as one of my favorite authors than I could think to name the person who thought up the first book of Samuel. If, indeed, there was only one such person.
It was the subject of her book that I remembered: Hannibal of Carthage. I did not even remember the title, although it was the same as the subject. It was a generic title by what I thought at the time was a generic author of historical novels. Yes, the book was fiction. But she did not invent the plot. She only reported it. The plot was living history. How much credit should she get for telling us the truth?
Today, I understand how rare that is, and I also see what craft and dedication went into fashioning that book. She understood the real issue that is at stake in Hannibal’s undertaking and the true reason he was defeated: that his own most powerful countrymen and those he sought to liberate among the Roman vassals did not in the end support the undertaking. You can lead a man to freedom, but you cannot make him take it. You can give your country your all, but you will not always win support. It may be hard to build an empire, but it is harder still to fight an empire without in turn trying to build another one.
And in her skimpy, self-effacing introduction, she also reveals some other things she knew:
“They were Phoenicians, and they shared a common ancestry with Abraham. Despite their epic enterprise on land and sea, no literature survives to shelter their good name. Yet they had admirable qualities, and they appreciated their audacious leader. The Carthaginian majorities did not fail Hannibal. It was the ruling few who undermined him and betrayed him. In the Third Punic War the Carthaginians displayed the ultimate in gallantry. They held out to the death. Their town was sacked and burned and razed, and by tradition, sown with salt. The English, French, and Spaniards, the Portuguese, the Irish and the Welsh that have inherited Semitic features from the Lord knows where, have learned their ancient history from the words of Rome. The ties of language, it appears, are stronger than the ties of blood.”
Not only is this true, but also it often scans! Many of the sentences arrange themselves into perfect iambs:
Their town/ was sacked/ and burned, and razed/ and by/ tradi/tion sown/with salt./
How perfect is that? Who was this woman whose prose was almost poetry, her words like prophecies? How is it that I overlooked her contribution, thinking it was only the subject matter and not what she had to say about it?
She writes: “The reader is pursuing here more than a brilliant general, more than a gallant soldier. He is pursuing a much rarer incarnation — a true patriot. It was without the taint, so seldom absent, of a personal ambition.”
Is it possible that she was like that, too? So intent on the task of telling her story, that she did not make the reader notice who it was that told it?
In this day and age when every author is compelled to sell not his books, his words, his writing or his message, but his own personal brand, isn’t that refreshing? She did not want to make us think of her. She wanted to assign all the glory that he’d earned to Hannibal.
But I still want to know, who was she?
Biographical Conjectures
I don’t know the answer, but I do have a theory, hanging on a few loose facts. Although the name of the author on the title page is “Mary Dolan”, on the copyright page she is listed as Marie M. Dolan. The copyright date is 1955. The Publisher is MacMillan.
Did she die intestate and without any living heirs? How did her personal records come to be floating around in cyberspace? Is she buried in a pauper’s grave somewhere? Or did she live a comfortable life, and was the obscurity that surrounded her something that she wanted for herself?
Here is what we learn about her from www.passportland.com:
Marie Margaret Dolan (5 July 1906, Wilmette, Illinois – 21 April 1997, New York City, NY) was the daughter of Edward B and Mary C Dolan.
In 1910, she was living with her parents at 824 Oakwood Drive, New Trier, Illinois.
In 1930, she was living with her widowed mother at 29 West End Avenue, Chicago. Her occupation looks like something to do with advertising.
On 30 June 1937, she sailed from Cherbourg to New York on the SS Europa. Marie Dolan was living at 110 Morningside Drive, New York, NY (an apartment block close to Columbia University).
In 1950, Marie Dolan was living at 110 Morningside Drive, New York, NY, with her mother Mary C Dolan. Her 1950 trip took her by sea to Europe, arriving in Piraeus, Greece on 14 May, then Italy, France and Spain. She sailed back to New York on the SS LaGuardia from Gibraltar on 21/22 June, arriving 28 June 1950. She was single.
I also know that she is listed in the catalog of Columbia University for the year 1930/31. Was she a gifted classics scholar who retired early and then went in 1950 to visit all the sites that she describes in her book, the better to prepare for its eventual publication in 1955?
Was she a lonely spinster living with her mother at the time of her 1950 European trip? Did her mother die sometime between 1950 and 1955? She dedicated the book to her: “To the memory of my mother, who was herself a person of good courage.” Herself a person of good courage? Implying what? Like Hannibal? Or like Mary Dolan?
Marie M. Dolan died on the 21st of Apri in 1997 in New York City. Where is she buried? Who came to the funeral? Who is her intellectual heir? Or didn’t she need one to spread the faith of what she believed in? Did she perhaps trust that despite the fact that the Grand Prairie Memorial Library, and many others like it, unshelved her books as early as 1990, that someday soon a champion would arise to bring them back to light? Or did she think the seed was sown, and was she content to let the book die with her, as long as someone who had read it long ago recalled the lessons learned?
Chapter 1
14 year old Katie Turner and her parents moved into an old Victorian 2 story house
not knowing the history behind it. It had been abandoned for five years before they
bought it and there were many stories about it. It had been the scene of a very
horrific and multiple murders and the spirits still haunted it. Katie did not believe
this since she did not believe in that sort of thing but was investigating anyway.
However when things started happening that was unexplained she started believing
and wondering if maybe these things were true. However when she did research on
the stories, nothing came up. “There isn’t a thing on the house.” she said as she
closed another book. She then looked at the clock and realized she had better get
home so she gathered up her books and left the library.
She took out her i-pod and put the ear buds to her ears. She hoped on her bike and
headed for home. As she approached she felt a cold chill that made her shiver. “It
isn’t that cold outside.” she said to herself as she reached her house and parked her
bike. She took the ear buds out and shoved the I-pod back into her back pack.
“Mom.” she said as she sat her back pack down on the sofa.
She began to search around and as she was searching she saw the blood splatters all
over. She began to panic and frantically searched for her mom. She reached the
bathroom and heard water running. “Mom you in here?” she asked as she turned
the knob. She noticed it was wet with something and as she looked down her hand
was covered in blood. She then opened the door and found the lifeless, headless
body of her mom lying in the bathtub.
She screamed and ran over to her mom even though she knew she was dead. She
reached in the bathtub and pulled her dead mother out. “Mom.” she screamed as
she threw the body back into the bathtub. She got up and left the house and down
the road screaming.
A neighbor heard the screams and went out to investigate. He spotted her covered
in blood and ran over. “Are you ok dear?’ he asked as he approached her. She
looked at him through her tear stained eyes. “My mom is dead.” she said as she
struggled to get the words out. The guy reached for his cell phone and when he
turned around he spotted her running back down the road towards the house.
He ran after her with the 911 operator on the line. When he found her she was
sitting beside her mother’s body. He then turned and ran out of the house because
he was about to get sick and needed air. He wasn’t wanting to stay, but he knew he
had too because he could not leave the scene until the authority’s arrived.
When he was outside he could fell the cold chills. He then heard the sirens and hung
up. He should have left then but he didn’t. The police than asked him questions and
as soon as he answered they sent him home. The cops entered and right away
realized that it looked like a scene straight out of a horror movie. There were at
least two dozen cops there, plus the crime scene unit, detectives, uniformed officers,
the coroner, and a social worker. The cops found the little girl sitting beside the
headless body of her mother.
The house was taped off and the investigation was started. They searched
everywhere and could not find the head of the mother, but found a note instead
telling them to get out of his house. “Not sure what happened but we have a murder
on the loose carrying around a severed head.” one of them said. So they finished
their work and left. They heard the stories too but did not believe them.
However as they were leaving they saw a mysterious black creature descend from
the house holding the severed head in one hand and a knife looking tool in the
other. They then shouted freeze and called for back-up, but when back-up arrived
the creature had disappeared.
The mysterious creature than re entered the house and descended back into the wall
and ate the head of the dead woman and waited for his next victim.
Later that night
Katie was released to the custody of her Father and she was upstairs working on
some research about the house. Her dad was downstairs and watching the news.
She was so absorbed in her work that she did not see the headless spirit of her mom
approaching her. She felt a cold breeze to make sure that the windows were closed
and to her surprise they was. She then rubbed her arms before getting up to get a
blanket. As she was sitting back down she saw the ghost of her mother sitting on
her desk and she screamed really loud.
She ran out of the room screaming and went to the living room where her father
was and screamed when she found his lifeless, headless, and cold body still sitting in
his recliner. She knew he was dead but she picked up his body anyway and
screamed as she threw it back down in the chair. She then ran out of the housed
and down the street screaming.
The neighbors heard the screaming and went out to investigate. They then found
Katie covered in blood and screaming “ My daddy is dead. My daddy is dead.” she
screamed. One of the neighbors called 911 while the others stayed behind to try and
keep her from running back to the scene. The officers than came with detectives,
the coroner, investigators, and un uniformed officers. They then started questioning
everyone including Katie and once again no one knew a thing. So they headed down
to the house and the crime scene tape was quickly put up. They saw the headless
body of her father and it was taken away. They then searched all over the house for
the father’s severed head and once again came up with nothing but a note that was
exactly like the first.
“ For fuck sakes what is going on in this house?” the lead detective said as he
picked up the note and put it in the baggie. So the investigation was done and
everyone turned and left the house. As they were leaving they all spotted the same
black mysterious creature and once again back up was called. However, this time
someone took some pictures of the creature but when the pictures was developed
nothing was there. However, the pictures was distorted in the place where the
creature should have been. So they knew something was there but did not know
what it was.
No mama please don’t kill me.
I am going to be a baby someday.
You will grow to love me
just wait and see.
No mama don’t do it
I love you and you love me.
So please don’t kill me
you will miss me so wait and see.
I am not just a thing that you can throw away
I am a human being that has bones and muscles.
I can feel pain as well.
And I move around, don’t you feel me just moving about.
No mama I am sorry I won’t kick you anymore.
It is my fault that you are doing this.
I will stop and won’t move till I come out
because then I will move about.
So please don’t kill me
for you will miss me, just wait and see.
I am down to the birth canal and ready to come out
So don’t kill me for I will soon be free.
[Note: This article was originally published on Hubpages in 2009. Since the content was deemed to violate Hubpages editorial policy in 2012, it has been moved to PubWages.]
Only a Prince is Denied Constant Contact with his Mother
My daughter and I are watching Moribito, a Japanese animated series about a woman warrior charged with protecting a prince of the royal blood from the Mikado’s assassins. Balsa, the warrior, and Chagum, the little prince, are walking along, and the prince is very tired. He almost falls asleep on his feet and stumbles. Balsa turns her back and lowers herself, offering to give him a piggy back ride. The prince doesn’t understand what she wants. She explains to him that if he had not been born of royal blood, he would have spent his first few years being carried on his mother’s back.
I’m really tired, and up to this point, I haven’t been totally focused on the show. However, this unexpected piece of information gets my attention. What is she saying? If he hadn’t been a prince, he would have been a chimpanzee?
Humans don’t carry their babies on their backs for the first few years of life. Humans leave their babies in cribs and playpens, while they do something else. When going from one location to another, humans put babies in prams, and strollers and child safety car seats. Piggy back rides are not a real form of transportation or a way to balance work and child-care. Piggy back rides are just a game we play during the small periods of time when our attention is focused exclusively on the child. Right?
Wrong! For most of mankind’s existence, all the way through mesolithic era, we were hunter-gatherers who carried our children on our backs all day long. This usually lasted for the first four years of the child’s life. Even with the advent of agriculture, it was not uncommon for women to labor in the fields and rice paddies with an infant or small child strapped to their backs.
Photo Credit: Alaska’s Digital Archives
What about feminism? Before the advent of feminism, weren’t most women confined to the home and prohibited from working? Hardly. Women have always worked. Women have always had children. So how did our ancestors balance work and childcare? The balance was achieved on the mother’s back.
Hunter-gatherer childhoods
Before there was agriculture, a surplus of food, and social stratification, we were all hunter-gatherers. In hunter-gatherer societies, all adults are responsible for gathering food in quantities that are sufficient to feed themselves. Women give birth alone in the bush and then introduce the newborn to their friends. Sometimes other women who have milk will help nurse the baby, because the collustrum that the mother produces is not enough. The mother and other women of her tribe may take turns nursing the newborn, but there is no question that primary responsibility for the infant is with the mother. Although others may be helping with the caretaking, the baby’s attachment to its mother, once it is old enough to form one, is very secure. Even if the mother goes off to hunt for food, leaving the baby in another’s care, her absence is not of long duration, and the person caring for the child while she is gone is a close family member. Children are never left in the care of someone with whom they do not already have a relationship of great intimacy and of long standing
Photo Credit: Lighter Footsteps
Excerpt from POPULATION PRESSURE
“…the !Kung Bushmen have been called `affluent’, but a mother carries her child with her at all times up to four years of age; this is equivalent to about 4,900 miles in the course of gathering the plant foods which are the Bushmen’s primary subsistence resource. On each trek a woman carries the child both ways, and on the return trip is also loaded with several days’ supply of roots, nuts, berries, and firewood.” Population Pressure and Cultural Adjustment,Virginia Abernethy, page 34.
How did we get from this egalitarian arrangement, where women work and care for children at the same time, to the sorts of society where women’s feet were bound in order to keep them from leaving the house? Or the feminine ideal of the highly corseted woman who is incapable of physical exertion because she has trouble breathing?
Agriculture created social stratification. Affluent women did not need to work. A rich man’s wife could concentrate on child-rearing alone. This was considered a way to lighten a woman’s workload. A woman might even have servants who relieved her of the need to do anything, including caring for her own children. In every society where some women didn’t work outside the home, many more women labored in the fields and in domestic service, and carried heavy burdens. There has never been a society where complete indolence was the norm for women.
Feminism attempted to “liberate” women who were reasonably well off from the sometimes stultifying expectation that they not take on undue burdens beyond the domestic sphere.
In the current debate about child-care, a survey of modern day hunter-gatherer societies has been used as a way to determine what sort of child care arrangments human infants and small children need. Infants evolved to develop under certain conditions, it is argued, and it’s important to find a childcare arrangement that fosters optimal cognitive development.
The !Kung bushmen, for instance, have been used to bolster an argument that human young need constant contact with the mother, and hence the modern day mother should not work outside the home.
Opponents of this viewpoint argue that daycare is perfectly natural, because in most hunter-gatherer societies women help each other with child care. There is a high degree of cooperation among tribal women. “It takes a village to raise a child.”
In fact, both views present an unrealistic idealization. A woman who has no social network has difficulty raising a child alone, even if working for others is not economically required. The child cannot develop optimally without social contacts and without seeing his mother interacting with others in a natural social setting. On the other hand, it is not true that leaving a child in a daycare center where he has no intimate, long term relationship with individual caretakers is the equivalent of cooperative child care in a hunter-gatherer tribe.
Excerpt from HUNTER-GATHERER CHILDHOODS
“As for maternal primacy in hunter-gatherers, it is strongly supported by the !Kung studies and consistently evident in older ethnographies, and it is also found in recent scientific studies, including those presented as exceptions to this rule.Most notably, perhaps, it is very evident in the Agta, the only hunter-gatherer culture on record where women do half the hunting. If maternal primacy were facultative, it seems the Agta would depart from it. They do not, nor do any other hunter-gatherers studied so far. Exclusive maternal care is non-existent and was never claimed, but maternal primacy is a feautre of hunter-gatherer childhood. It may be that maternal primacy affords an opportunity for attachment that gives the mother a unique place in the hierarchy of infant attachments.”Melvin Konner, “Hunter gatherer infancy and childhood: the !Kung and others” page 62, Hunter-Gatherer Childhoods.
The !Kung People
A group of !Kung Women with a Child
The Agta people of Luzon in the Philipines are unusual among hunter-gatherers, in that their women hunt as well as gather. Nevertheless, attachment of children to their mothers, rather than alternate caretakers, is primary. Agta women are just as capable as their men of bringing home the bacon, but they still are the primary caretakers of their own children.
Agta Hiking with Outsiders
The Mommy Wars
When I was in law school, I had a friend who was a feminist. I was nineteen at the time and she was about thirty-three. She was married and had a three year old daughter. I really wanted to have a child, too, right then, but there was pressure on me to become a professional. My feminist friend had taught high school, not because she wanted to teach, but because, when she was growing up, there were, according to her, only three jobs that women could have outside the home: nurse, teacher, and secretary. Of the three, she thought being a teacher was the least demeaning, so that’s what she chose. As soon as women lawyers became commonplace, my friend went back to school to join their ranks. She was no pioneer feminist. She was definitely rank and file.
Every time I mentioned that some women might enjoy staying home and raising children, my friend would frown and say: “Nobody really wants to do that. They’re just being brainwashed.”
Sword and I and the Infantino Carrier: This photo was taken on January 1, 2000 in Taichung
I didn’t consider myself brainwashed, but I could think of nothing I wanted more at that moment than to quit school and stay home to raise a baby. It was only social pressure that kept me from doing it.
I wondered why my friend wanted to believe that everyone wanted what she wanted. Couldn’t each individual choose what was best for her? Why do we have to be so normative? Why must there be only one path?
I now know the answer. People don’t live in a social vacuum. The choices others make can severely limit their own choices.People don’t work just because of the mental challenge or the monetary inducement. Many people enjoy working because it’s a nice environment in which to socialize.
My friend’s daughter and my daughter were inseparable when they started preschool together
Today, when the majority of women work, the women who stay home and their children are often isolated and lonely. It’s not because taking care of a child is hard that many would-be stay-at-home mothers burn out and go back to work. It’s because all their friends are at work and there’s nobody to talk to all day long, except for a helpless little child. It was never meant to be like that.
When I was growing up, my mother stayed at home, but so did most of her friends. My mother was not stuck at home, forced to converse with a small child all day long. She and her friends would visit each other in their homes. Some of my best memories of my early childhood were of sitting under the table and listening to the women talk.
Younger children rely on older children: Bow takes Sword’s hand so they can explore together
Children do best, not when they are the constant focus of their caretaker’s attention, but when they are allowed to observe the social interactions of their parents. This prepares them for social lives of their own.
Piggyback: On my 46th birthday, still carrying Bow, who is a little over four years of age. The Piggyback ride becomes harder to sustain after the child attains the age of five.
My Own Experiences as a Mother
I have been on both sides of the mommy divide. I worked outside the home during my daughter’s first two years. My mother helped for the first few months, but after that I had a nanny. When the nanny arrived, I left. When I got home, the nanny left. My daughter was never in daycare, but this arrangment was less than optimal, because she never saw me and the nanny socializing together. If I had to do it over again, I would invite the nanny to dinner sometimes, or go visit her on her day off, if she could stand to have us. My daughter would have benefited from seeing more adult interactions, and from not always being the focus of our attention.
It’s fine for someone other than the mother to help care for a child. The hunter-gatherers do this, too. What is not so great is if the person helping is essentially a stranger. Children need to feel that whoever is taking care of them is part of the family. This doesn’t mean caretakers have to be blood kin, but they shouldn’t be just hired hands. They have to be part of the parents’ social circle, for the sake of the child’s social development.
When my daughter was two, we settled down in the Ozarks, on ten acres of our own, and I became a stay-at-home mom, waiting for the birth of chimpanzee who would become my son Bow. I loved all the time I got to spend with Sword, but was not so thrilled with the extreme social isolation that we had to contend with.
In the summer of 2002, my friend June came to visit us from Taiwan, bringing her daughter Delight. During the two months of their visit, the two girls rekindled their earlier friendship, and Delight accompanied Sword to preschool for the first two weeks. Neither girl spoke English, but as long as they were together, my daughter did not find the preschool environment too stressful. Delight, who is 17 months her elder, was always looking out fo her.
In hunter-gatherer societies, once a child stops riding on the parent’s back, he is often cared for by older siblings in a group of multiaged children, all of them members of the same tribe. They play at being little adults, and their exploration of adult roles is tolerated by the entire community.
When I first adopted Bow, I intended to raise him in every way like a human. However, I soon found that unless I carried him on my back, I couldn’t get anything done. He was a real trouble maker on the ground, but if he was riding on my back, he let me decide where we were going, and what we were going to do.
I continued to carry him on my back until a couple of months after he turned five. It was the only way I could integrate my role as his mother with the other roles I play.
It was only in the past few weeks, after viewing Moribito with my daughter, that I began to realize that the chimpanzee way of childcare and the human way diverged very, very recently. We were all carried on our mothers’ backs, even after the invention of agriculture, unless we were very wealthy — or of the royal blood.
Every Child A Prince
Today, almost every child is like Prince Chagum, never having been carried on her back by his mother, and having no idea by what effort his food is procured. Most modern children are starved for intimate contact with parents, but paradoxically, they receive too much attention during the short periods when their parents are available.
When you carry your child on your back, he gets to watch and learn about the world in which you live. He is aware that his welfare and yours are one, and he knows that he’s not the one calling the shots.
The tragedy of modern child care is that the average child has become a prince, pampered and spoiled into thinking he is the center of the universe, unaware of the ways in which his parents procure food, on the one hand, and on the other hand, completely deprived of the intimacy and security of constant contact with his mother and her social circle.
Copyright 2009, 2012 Aya Katz
Here are some comments that were left on this article when it was published at Hubpages:
Comments
Laila Rajaratnam 3 years ago
Very true Aya..the modern child is very self centered as well!Even I remember my mom’s friends coming over and that feeling is so very good,trying to make sense of their converstions! Thanks for the memories!:)
Aya Katz Hub Author 3 years ago
Laila, thanks! Being around grownups is a great way to learn. Parents sometimes underestimate what children are capable of absorbing just from passive observation.
level1diet 3 years ago
While you write mainly about children, remember that there is a child inside each of us. Still there, ready to control and dominate us.
Gosh I just love this stuff — thanks for the nice lesson and historical perspective. Before the diet craze hit me, I spent most of my free time sitting in a library reading this sort of thing, or up on the mountain behind my home in New Mexico, thinking about these topics… who we are, why we’re here, where we’re going… how we relate to each other, the world and the universe.
Good stuff. I want more. Give me more!
Aya Katz Hub Author 3 years ago
Level1diet, thanks for your comment. Yes, we all have our inner child. As Wordsworth say: “The child is father to the man…”
Thanks for your enthusiastic response!
Jerilee Wei Level 3 Commenter 3 years ago
Excellent thoughts Aya! I’m going to be thinking about all this for days. Think I’ll send it to my son in Hong Kong too. Wish I’d read this about thirty-six years ago.
Aya Katz Hub Author 3 years ago
Jerilee, thanks! That means a lot!
zmar 3 years ago
:)HAO
ReuVera Level 3 Commenter 3 years ago
Very interesting hub. The custom of carrying little children on mother’s back is also typical for Slavic peoples (women in the fields), also Kazakh people were doing the same (I was born and lived in Kazakhstan), of course, Kazakhs used to be nomadic people, but even nowadays “apa” (“mother” in Kazakh) often carries a kid on her back. I’ve read some statistics (I don’t remember where), that tribe babies tend to be much healthier psychologically that their Caucasian counterparts exactly thanks to the fact that mothers carry them on their body for several first years of their lives.
What is remarkable, I was using every opportunity to hold my son on my hands when he was little. It was easy as he was in a feather weight and I carried him until he was 5-6 years old at every convenient opportunity. It was so nice to feel his warmth next to my chest, and also this way it was more convenient to talk when we walked from somewhere. Neighbors were reasoning me not to do this, but I used to answer that I was selfish and wanted to carry him as long as I could and he didn’t mind. Because when he grows up, I just won’t be able to carry him, no matter how I would like to. I also was spending all the time I could with him. I worked part-time on purpose, only the hours when he was in a kindergarten (kindergartens in Israel are only for half of the day). I figured out that anyway I’ll have to pay the extra-earned money to a baby sitter, so why not being your own child’s babysitter? I must say for sure that all this paid off now, when my son is adult and we still have a close bond with him which helps a lot in hard times.
ngureco Level 2 Commenter 3 years ago
Hello, Aya Katz. It’s good I can now be able to post a comment on this hub.
Your hub reminds me of my mother. One’s mother is the most important person on earth. She’s one person who will sacrifice her career or her life for the sake of her children. Many of us are not able to realize this until your mother is no more and you reflect back on what she did for you – your life is a continuation of her life.
Aya Katz, make sure to buy an ice cream for your mum today and not tomorrow.
bgamall Level 4 Commenter 3 years ago
Anthropology written in an interesting way! Nice hub, Aya.
Iphigenia 3 years ago
this was a truly interesting read – you’ve introduced me to a completely new subject – anthropology – I’ve never read an anthropological piece before. Thanks!
Aya Katz Hub Author 3 years ago
Zmar, ni hao.
Reuvera, thanks for your comment. You seem to have known instinctively what was the best thing for you and your son! Good for you. So many people are pressured into giving in to social norms that are not good for either mother or child.
Ngureco, thanks for your comment. I’m glad you were finally able to make it. Did you ever find out what the problem was before? You are so right. All too often we take our mothers for granted.
Bgamall, thanks!
Iphigenia, thanks for your comment. Glad you liked it!
justmesuzanne 2 years ago
Lovely and interesting! 🙂
Aya Katz Hub Author 2 years ago
Thanks, Suzanne!
tinigenie 3 months ago
All I have to say is ” You are Fabulous, with a capital F. What a hub, it made me proud to be a mother. Very uplifting!
Aya Katz Hub Author 3 months ago
Thanks, Tinigenie! That means a lot!
Sally’s Trove 3 months ago
I believe that the feminism movement slid past the crucial role of child rearing. It went right to gaining economic and political power for women, without regard for the crucial role women have in life’s first obligation…creating and nurturing children to become adults who would create and nurture children in the same way. Because of that omission, Phyllis Schlafly had and continues to have her heyday. Both views, hers and feminism’s, are extremes.
With that much said, I’m thinking about our modern child back carriers which fathers often use. But this use seems to be for purposes of taking hikes, as in recreational. I don’t think fathers use these packs to have a child glued to them so that the child can experience his world as it is laid out minute to minute.
I have one daughter. As a baby, she was glued to my body while I made the morning coffee, chatted with friends on the phone, went grocery shopping, and just went about life’s business. If she wasn’t in a front or back pack, she was resting on my hip. She got to see the world through my eyes. And I’ve never regretted one moment of it.
Aya Katz Hub Author 3 months ago
Sally’s Trove, thanks for your comment. I think your daughter was (and is) very lucky to have a mother like you.
And, yes, I agree with what you say about the feminist movement’s shortcomings and as well as those of the Schlafly opposition to it.
[Note: The time periods since the writing of the comments above are to be calculated backwards from May 22, 2012 in order to reveal the approximate dates when originally posted.]
Green Family Values: Baby Wearing | Lighter Footstep
Motrin has angered parent groups with an allegedly insensitive commercial about baby wearing. The controversy won’t cool the revival of this ancient practice.
Sometimes we don’t realize who our favorite authors really are. For years, when people asked me to list mine, the list included Ayn Rand, Emily Bronte, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Robert Heinlein, Adam Corby, J.D. Salinger, Muriel Spark, Betty Smith and a few others who changed from time to time. Mary Dolan did not figure in that list. Why? Because I couldn’t even remember her name. But this did not mean that she had not left a lasting impression on me. It was just that I took her for granted. I believed, foolishly, that she would always be there for me, her book waiting to be re-read, available at a moment’s notice in the local library.
